Could this be a MLC?

[Sotto]

Hi Haunted, I think it comes down to the whole 'opposites' thing in MLC. You were loved, and now are hated. You represent something (his 'former' life?) that he needs to get away from. His M to you is 'holding him back' from finding the happiness he seeks. He feels pressured by the fact that you even exist, and are a reminder of things he has done which may be hard to face...

It is a whole lot easier and more comfortable to 'blame' someone else for your own struggles, than honestly face them yourself. As his closest relationship, you come in for some of that blame.

The hatred will pass. I don't feel that from my H - more a regret that this had to happen, but he needs to get out and start a new life. But my H is very much a 'nice guy' and it takes a lot for his anger to show.

I've been reading some of the articles from the Hearts Blessings website lately. If you go onto her homepage and search for 'hate' some interesting stuff will come up about MLC and hatred. Her Q&As and articles are well worth a read I think. DB/DR touch on MLC, and recognise it can be central to marital troubles - but they don't give in-depth insight into dynamics, and this is where I have found Hearts Blessings helpful.

Also, try not to internalise what is happening for him. This is his own stuff that he is projecting on to you.

Take care xx