My lizard and her tunnel ...

[AJM]

Like she's challenging you? Yes. Except it's you and not you she's challenging, right? You are more representative.

That's why it's important to calmly and plainly not bite at the spew apple when its dangled. You're doing great with that by your description.

It is interesting to watch her sometimes.

Yes it is, but be careful. I know from experience that can be an addiction.

It's an addiction with a lot of pain for you.

The analogy of it being like a child and tough love is spot on. But be careful not to become the "parent". You're not that person, and you don't need to be cast as that person. It's not the right fit and will mire you down in a bad dynamic.

You know what you want for her. You know what you want from her. You know what you want in general. But let's just say you get part of what you want. What would that be? What are you willing to accept in lieu of getting all of it. Not that getting all of it is out of reach. It's anyone's guess at this point. But what are your priorities in that list?

It's likely going to be a long time while you wait. What are you doing for you? What are you doing to GAL and reinvent yourself? To build the rest of that family unit you want?

What does Late30's 2.0 start to look like in your future vision? Just you. I suspect there are a few things you'd like to change about yourself, right? What are they?

One more thought for the night Be careful of other women. You're a bit vulnerable, down 40 pounds, and likely very friendly when not around W. Seems there's a lot of people that find that very attractive, may also be vulnerable at this point in their lives, and that would be a set back in your relationship that might be hard to overcome with W.

Put some thought into what 2.0 looks like. I think you'll find that worthwhile.

Keep up the good work and don't let the spew stick to you.

AJ