new here

[lonelee]

Nothing newsworthy really here to report but I haven’t posted for a few days so thought I would.

I feel like I have been doing this S for years when in reality it has only been a little over a month that he’s been out of the home and 4 since BD. Things have been going really between us and I’m happy for that, but I’m still longing to hear an update about the OW situation. I don’t want to ask outright and have been advised not to do R talk, I am no longer checking his email (and it feels good not to)so there’s no way of knowing unless he tells me. And then, I’m not sure if I’m supposed to believe him because of the “believe only half of what he tells you rule” BTW I’m not really clear on the meaning of this.. how do you decipher what to believe and what to distrust?

I guess the waiting in limbo is kind of hard because I feel like I’m not working toward the reconciliation that I desire. I’m also unsure how much effort he is putting into the consideration of reconciliation at this point and the not knowing is driving me crazy. I am not in a hurry to become H and W at this point or even considering his moving back home, don’t get me wrong here, but I’m so damned nosey and inpatient that treading water is getting old.

Here are some Goals
GAL more, to distract me from thinking too much
Register for an Adult Ed class so I have something to look forward to that is just for me
Get some exercise (one that doesn’t include making “coffee” with spouse)
Maintain a PMA about this situation and for myself in general.

because as bad as it seems to be for me, not getting everything that I want currently with my H, my sit is not as bad as some of the testimonies that have been shared here. I am grateful he is kind to me in so many ways, he is seeing his kids, he is financially supporting me and we are still sharing, talking and having fun.

I want to thank everyone in this forum from the newbie’s, to the vets and for the long timers because everyone has something to bring to the table and share. I read many situations that are similar to mine and very different from mine, from H or W, way wards or not there is usually some very good advice that can be relatable to my current situation or something that I find to save in my back pocket for a rainy day … : )

Make a great day all!