My lizard and her tunnel ...

[AJM]

Do I read that correctly? She still and always has loved you and was talking marriage with this OM?
Did you also mention that she knows what to say to keep you listening?

Whenever I hear somebody say they need to "find themselves" I cringe and remember I hate Oprah for those words (and many other falsehoods she spreads via her infomercials.)

I don't buy the "I need to find myself" per se. I buy the idea that I don't know what I want. Or that I focused on somebody so much I lost my identity without them. In a marriage, there are those that say you should become one with one another. That implies a loss of individual identity. I.e. one is no longer important without the other. They became a pair.

Reality is that you only need "finding yourself" when you are describing figuring out your identity without the other person in my opinion.

While she's bat chit crazy... keep your distance. I heard some similar things and my radar is pinging very loudly at your description.

Go slow and put some more thought into the idea that she'll have to prove she wants to be there, OM is long gone, and she wants to make the marriage work for the right reasons before you talk to her again.

That'd be my $0.02 worth.


AJ