Zelda - Baby One More Time

[Zelda09]

I think I've come up with a good re-framing technique to help me look at those memories where STBX when he was smiling and lovely, looking like a wonderful man a fool would leave.

I am going to overlay it with a three year old, looking loving and smiling. (The tantrums just get to be a bit much in an adult.)

I think this is the best possible way for me right now to distance myself and accept what was happening in these years.

Because I just can't get it in my head or gut that STBX is an abuser, or an awful person, and that is why when I 'rationally' try to pin him there without a mask, it doesn't stick?

An overgrown and dangerous toddler, that seems like something that will maybe stick for me. How I do wish he would take charge of growing up, but nobody got time for that.