Good. If she does want it, letting her wonder what has happened because she didn't have to worry about it because she counted on you taking the initiative, is a good thing. Given her anger, right now she may not want that hug. Either way, it is the right thing to not initiate.
You might find Sandi2's WW threads helpful, as the anger and resentment and the attitude of many WAWs can mirror the WW in ways, although there are differences too. She is especially frank about the attitude of a woman who does not want to work on the R and for the time has stopped thinking of you in good ways. And remember Sandi was a WW & came back, so just because many of our WAWs go through this, doesn't mean the end.
Hang tight & good job.
Me: 50 W:43 S6, S3 M: 12 yrs. T: 17 M is bad & Not happy Bomb Mar '14 S 5 Feb '15 D Bomb 13 Apr '15 (but "no hurry") DB Coach May '15 Wants proceed on D Aug '15 Starting 1-on-1 negotiations Sept '15
Well I know she does because when we meet there's still a lot of love between us.
Yesterday was the first time I didn't take her up on an opportunity to meet. Mind you, this was her last chance to use the apartment issues as an excuse, and she knows that. Also her last chance of seeing me before I go away for the retreat.
I'm quite curious to see how she handles this once I'm back and she's out of reasons, and I still don't pursue. This probably confuses the hell out of her because I'm usually very pursuing.
In anycase the distance seems to have a calming effect on me and from her I get the impression it stirrs up her anger, and then she calls me to vent.
I wish I could turn back the clock and make it work. I love her so much. But there's no changing the past.
Me: 29, wife: 29 Been together 6 years. Married June 13 (2years) Separation: 22/6/15 W stopped wearing wedding ring 30/6/15
She's again on the texting spree today. Tried to get me to come home pick up stuff for the retreat in a subtle way but I said I'm sorted.
Then she kind of took a jab at me, reiterating the break up by saying 'you can leave your stuff here for now' which hurt, but I didn't respond.
Overall positive communication but I'm really craving a prolonged period of NC to heal. Constantly feeling rejected
Ohgosh - The key isnt really the no contact. Sure, that helps. But the real key is emotional detachment. If you can see her texts for what they are and not let the little pokes and jabs get to you, then the pain recedes. Of course, being away can help with your progress - but dont think that just because you dont talk to her for a week and a half, that you wont feel the pain from those pokes when you come back. Good luck!
