ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Okay I'm on my phone and having site difficulties so I will post this big update when I get home to my laptop. The phone erased the whole story I just spent 1/2 hour writing on my phone. Easier when I get home.
Last edited by ItHurts; 08/17/1503:45 AM.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Sorry guys...just spent a half hour typing a big update and I lost it. Will retype it now.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Thanks for posting ItHurts, I read your thread my first week on here and couldn't fathom surviving an entire year. Now it's 8 months later and things are still happening. Every day is a new day.
Appreciate you still coming back on here to post.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
Yeah sorry for the tech difficulties guys. It took me forever to type it before and then I lost it all. Anyway here's my updated that starts a little over 2 weeks ago when I broke no contact and goes through today. Now those of you that have followed my story the past year plus know that I was and am very strict with no contact. WAW never hears from me really nor I her. All contacts made this last year are all documented in my previous posts. Anyway, onto my update...
So a couple weeks ago I am driving down the road, not even thinking at all about WAW, when suddenly I was overcome with this feeling of dread regarding her...hard to explain but you couldn't inore it. Like something was wrong with her or something. So I pulled over and texted her, after the usual lengthy NC period, asking if she was okay; that I got this weird feeling something was wrong. I apologized for the strange pop question but the feeling was just weird. She replied in about 5 minutes or so and said that it was very weird because she had just gotten a flat tire and was in process of getting it repaired. She referred to the Twilight Zone.
She then replied again with this...
"Been having dreams about you and the family lately. Last night I dreamt your Mom mooned me."
I kind of ignored the dream part and went instead with her Twilight Zone comment and said that we must've watched too many TZ marathons on New Year's Days all those years. Then I said they would probably just plug her tire and that would be that. She replied with:
"Hopefully all I need is a plug. Yeah we def watched a lot of those. Lol. I'll be home for a visit in less than two weeks. Think that's why I've been dreaming all these dreams. You ok? Thank you very much for checking on me. You were always concerned about my safety."
I replied with that she had crossed my mind a bit lately but that I figured if was just because it's been a year now. Then I reverted back to the car repair subject. She replied with:
"I think about you often and I pray for you."
I replied asking why...am I doomed or something and don't know it? She replied:
"No. I'll always pray for you. You... Although not my husband anymore will always mean a lot to me."
I responded by saying that that's normal for us both to feel like that after only a year apart after 18 years together.
She replied:
"Ok home and safe. My first flat tire in FLA. Thank you for checking on me. Can't lie you cross my mind a lot especially in times of stress. Mostly in my dreams you are there to help if I'm in trouble. It's like we don't talk in the dreams but you are off to the side watching me with a look on your face. It's your half smile look. And if I'm falling you pick me up and then you send me on my way knowing I'm ok. Safety net dreams I guess."
I didn't address the dreams directly because I didn't think we should go there so I just asked what kind of trouble is she in.
She replied:
"No trouble. Life is good. But obviously it's a lot of transition. I've created a whole new life. Have a good night. Thanks again for checking in. Stay well and be good to you."
I replied and said great that you're so happy. Have a good weekend as well! See ya!
Fast forward about three days. A mutual friend of ours who really sided with me regarding the docorce, as is usual...people pick a side...well this girl has always had my back and WAW knew it. Well I guess WAW talks to her every now and again and they had spoken about a month before. I learned that WAW told her that she still has really bad days where she really misses me. WAW also said later in their convo that she was thinking about moving back home because she misses her family but that she was torn about what to do.
Fast forward to this past Friday, three days ago. I get a text from a coworker who says " Your exwife was just in here looking for you."
So WAW is HERE! She came up from FL with her best friend that she moved down there with (see previous thread installments for the full story.) This weekend she traveled two states away to visit relatives but I assume she's coming back to our area to see her family some more before she goes back...which I have no idea how long she's even here. Now so far all I've heard was that she went into my work looking for me. I haven't heard a peep about anything else. So I am just waiting to see what happens...maintaining total radio silence and just telling myself if she wants to see you, SHE must make it happen. So I guess you could say I am laying low, in silence, playing the coward role.
Thoughts on any of this are welcome...ESPECIALLY from those here who know and have been following my story since the first thread. I will keep you updated.
I hope everyone is doing okay with their sitches. Sending the best to you all who are suffering as we all once did in the beginning.
Last edited by ItHurts; 08/17/1506:10 AM.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
No major update other than I think WAW goes back to FL tomorrow so I may not have to worry about seeing her if I get through tonight. In a way I am kind of glad I won't see her because there is really no point in it...there's really nothing to talk about and I don't want to risk opening old wounds again anyway...but she is back here in our area tonight so i still have to get through a few hours but I'll keep you all posted.
Last edited by ItHurts; 08/17/1511:19 PM.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hey Guys, Well looks like much ado about nothing. Never heard from WAW. Now how do I feel about this? Well strange in that part of me is very happy there wasn't a confrontation yet another part of me is disappointed because it would've been nice to see her. However in furthering my progress I am just carrying on with no contact. As I said before I'm not sure what good would have come from seeing her again after a year anyway. In any event it is what it is...I will just have to sort out my feelings on the issue. Not sure what to make of these recent goings on but I think I made a mistake making that contact with her...it was just such an overwhelming and uneasy feeling I got out of the blue that something was wrong with her but had I known it was just a flat tire I definitely wouldn't have. Oh well... I guess all that's left is for me to get up from the fall, dust myself off, and continue on.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Thanks Sandi...so do you think I handled everything okay? I don't want her to think she has me spinning at all...how can she think she does when I never talk to her...or is it just because I broke no contact that day?
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
