If you want to explore forgiveness then there are a couple of books I can recommend, the first is by Jeanne Safer forgive and not forgive and of course there is Scott Pecks book on evil, People of the Lie. Ironically both books were written in the same era.
The premise is, it isn't our job to forgive, only the spirit can forgive. Forgiveness requires that the one requiring forgiveness is asking and atoning for forgiveness and then we can choose or be chosen to become a channel for it. Forgiveness requires that transgressors request and targets channel.
There is no obligation on me to forgive WH, the spirit requires that I request forgiveness for my transgression, that of screaming banshee, neglect, and any harm to others through the damage WH did through me. It requires I advise at least one other person and that I atone.
As a result of my weaknesses I do not blame WH for his actions, I do not condone or agree, but I let go of my anger and eventually my hurt and just merely walk away. Leaving only love behind and my best prayers that he finds peace. That may mean asking forgiveness and atoning, in which case I am likely to forgive. The higher spirit will allow that.
To forgive without the full process is to enable the harm. If we can forgive then that is our gift to the higher spirit. It is our right but not our obligation.
I do not condemn after all I have my faults and that is not my role either, that is the spirits role.
Ultimately the higher spirit will bring the overdrawn account to a closure on behalf of every one of us. I ask is the abuser, compulsive, wayward, or MLC happy in their life, maybe, sometimes. There is an emptiness in their soul which is temporarily filled with activity, substances and distraction. I think on waking they cannot but see the hole which needs to be filled. As fast as it's filled it leaks, like a bath with no plug, the tap must be forever full on to stay partially full.
I like 12 steps as a process and I have a great admiration for DB which is about personal growth, becoming through adversity and developing into the best we can be. It is a process beyond repairing M or fending off D, it includes it but is not wholly that. It is because of the spirit here which in continuum applies those principles.
It is my hypothesis that those who cause damage fall into three camps, those that can because of situations and those that do deliberately who are in parlance evil. I place myself in the third and last camp, a reactor, the damage done was mainly to myself, I doubt WH was damaged by screaming banshee, I think it amused him to press those buttons. None the less the screaming banshee damaged others in my life, my inability to perform at work, my poor performance as a friend etc. besides the pain for glam sis and aged pa.
This is my own unique analysis on it and I am testing my hypothesis and so far it holds.
Those who do not awake and follow their journey who believe it is finished when the D paper is signed miss something important, they miss their spiritual journey to self, and to healing. I struggle with healing, a full mechanism has not yet been uncovered. I leave my love and project it that is enough to have loved, even though that may be unwanted, that is mine to give.
It seems unchristian to decide that forgiveness is not my job. In essence it is about control, I have control over only me, to forgive someone who does not request or want forgiveness is like trying to hold them accountable and tying them to you in deed. It creates a debt, makes me the burden of a creditor, gives me baggage. It is not my role to forgive nor to condemn, it is my role to heal and to let the spirit do its work for others.
A friend did me a great damage many years ago, quite deliberately, a financial damage in business, after 15 years I received a letter with a cheque and a short note which read " if you can forgive me, that's good and if you don't want this recompense then please donate it as you chose. I have been saddened by my choice and have not yet forgiven myself".
I banked the cheque and wrote one for Plan International, I chose a child in my friends name to sponsor for 12 years and I let her receive the information about the sponsored child for 12 years. I hope it brought her peace, at some point in those 12 years a glimmer of it. Otherwise I did not respond. I let the universe and higher power forgive, she had atoned.
I hope this explains my stance
V
Last edited by Vanilla; 08/17/1508:59 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
