Thanks, mvgfwd2. I'm still questioning myself at every move/or no move.
So H came home around 6am as usual. When I was leaving for work, I just said" I'm leaving" ( so please watch the kids) since he was sleeping. He got up and followed me to the entrance and was standing there looking at me, so I said "what?" ( not in a rude tone) H hugged me, and I didn't hug him back. H didn't say anything gave me a few nods and I left. I don't know what it is about. He looked very stressed as usual. Maybe he made up his mind about leaving so it was out of guilt, I don't know.
Anyway I talked to DB coach. He said H must be having MLC, thinking his life is half over. But his connection with kids being a dad is a few good things in his life right now, so keep it that way. Instead of focusing on him to ponder if I should ask him to leave or not, he told me to focus on myself right now. GAL and reclaim the girl I once was when I came to this country by myself to study, which is pretty adventurous. I am a confident, smart and sassy woman at work. People at work wouldn't see me as dependant or clingy person. It is in the relationship I always have a hard time being that person...so I will try to take a hard look at myself how I can be that person in the relationship as well. He also told me to smile more while he is around. To show him that I'm not what he expected of me. ( clingy, begging, sad)
He said this morning's his first physical contact must be a good sign. I don't know. I'll keep posting.
