So tad, the OM has so much power to have you miss your sons wedding? No way. He's an insignificant POS who is completely not worthy of you missing out on your sons biggest day of his life. You need to walk in there with confidence, and perhaps that woman on yours arm and focus on what the day is all about. Your son and his new wife. Because it isn't about you, OM, or exw. It's about them. And I'd bet not everyone is crowding in the house, it will be outside and you have no reason to go inside.
Yeah Tad, I had the same thought. The wedding is about your son not you. You're there for him, not the other way around.
As for the lunches to clear the air? Not so much. I see no reason you need to subject yourself to that unless you want to. In the end, you were there. You know what happened. You don't need "clarity" to see that.
She may need a chance to "reconcile" the past relationship. By reconcile I mean rationalize it and come to terms with the past. You loved her at some point and may want to give that to her. I'm not feeling that now is the time for that though, nor under those circumstances.
But don't let either of them stand between you and your son. Not for any reason. That would just be wrong as a parent.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
