It was hard not to have a reaction. I just took a second, thought of the rules, and said "oh. Sounds fun". I normally would have asked questions like who is going to be there? I am highly suspicious as she has never done this before. I don't know if this is a test or if she has other plans and this is a cover story. I guess I am just going to keep my mouth shut and try to follow the rules. Any advice here?
That story sounds like a typical cover-up to me, but it's hard to say. I know the vets always say to not snoop, but personally, I think you gotta do what's right for you. I put up with the stories for a while, and finally decided I had to know whether or not there was another man - there was, and I finally caught her by secretly recording a phone conversation. I never told her about this, and my W ended up confessing a few days later anyway, but for me, I felt I needed to know. It was better than the constant paranoia of wondering. Now, I don't suggest going to extremes, but I would recommend being on the lookout for obvious signs. It doesn't change anything about how you should react, and if you find out about OM, you don't bring it up to your W. It's only knowledge for your sake. I wanted to know, some people don't. You do what you think will help you the most.
I do get this. Knowledge is power. So it helps to know.
But at the same time, does it REALLY matter if there's an OM? For some people that's kind of a point of no return. If it's not for you, then I'm not sure it matters either way.
