Hey PT, you can take the lead with showing her right now. She has not the tools to be able to express her anger or emotions.
First, Show her that you will listen without judgement or criticism. You will really listen and validate (sounds like you are the right track here). You aren't going to argue about how she feels or tell her what to do ...you are listening. You become a safe place for her to voice things, hell you even feel welcoming to her to open up. See the did ffference between that person and the you she had for years. We are learning (Cali is spot on with that point, cannot be hammered enough)
Then, the next part...you Show her how you are able to express yours concisely, without drama, calmly. This will take practice, but you can do this.
