Continuing Limbo

[PeterV2]

So yesterday W claimed I was moving on as I've found someone else. This comes as a surprise to me. I would like to know who this someone else is. She said she's heard from someone about it. I told her one of my pet peeves is being falsely accused. I asked her who she's getting this misinformation from but she wouldn't divulge.

She asked me what web sites I'm on and told her SaveYourMarriage and StrongerMarriageNow, but didn't mention DivorceBusting. She thought I would be on on-line dating sites. I told her I was on those for 4 days shortly after BD but got off them when she came back and said we could work this out. That was 20 months ago and she's still pissed off at that as if it happened yesterday.

She does think I'm still on those dating sites but I told her I'm not.

She's upset that I look at porn sites. I told I don't have to. She's clearly upset about that.

She again said the A is over - it's not longer even an EA as OM has moved on. She does still occasionally send word that she's ok through a 3rd party. I told her that's not acceptable. She has to get him right out of her head. She said that was the deal and left it at that.

I told her I've only been interested in saving our marriage for the past year and a half and any information she has to the contrary is false.

Since that convo she's been friendlier and allowed some hugs.

I even kissed her on the lips last night and she didn't protest.

So I tried to kiss her on the lips when she left today and we got into the same old I'm to blame for all the past problems and that she needs time to work out her own issues. She claimed my needs trump hers. I denied that saying both our needs are valid. Her need is to keep a distance from me while she works out her issues. My needs are to save the marriage and get closer together to do so. But maybe we need the distance to save the marriage.

We did leave on a good note. And she said she's looking forward to seeing me play Sat.

I'll continue later - gotta go to band practice.