Nevergive up and MGoBlue were on the forum many, many years ago and I can only assume that their threads are long gone by way of deletion due to main frame purge.

Try reading reachingHigher's threads. She's a more recent woman who actually had her marriage restored, but it took her a long time to "get it" and understand patience and not rushing the process.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.