My lizard and her tunnel ...

[late30s]

So one thing I have been giving some thought to recently. What do I *need* in a relationship? Going to list here:

*All of these go two ways IMO, meaning anything I ask for, I intend to give as well.*

Loyalty -- Not just fidelity. I expect my partner to take my side in anything. At least make that show in public. Discussing it with me in private and pointing out what a stubborn donkey I am is fine.

Honesty -- Be truthful with each other, even when it [censored]. I would rather hear the truth and start dealing with something bad now.

Respect -- Respect each other. Respect the relationship. Accept that each person is their own individual fully capable of making their own decisions. This may include giving space when it is needed. Discussing things you may not want to talk about or dropping things you want to talk about. If it is me and I don't want to talk about something, I think that it is fair to provide a time when we CAN talk about it. Be respectful in arguments.

I'll probably add to this list as time goes on, but these are the big non-negotiable ones for me.