Hello

[714Dad]

V, there is always the cliche of the wife unloading on the dad when he gets home with the kids having been bad etc. right?

i did that, but not too often. instead it was texts, often intense and always from a depressed point that i sent these over maybe a 20 minute period on whatever random day.

usually one spat every two weeks or so on a bad day. but as my W often pointed out they were so totally hopeless so as to be death wishes. i felt everything so intensely. and she always tried to help me and asked what she could do. i reread them and there are lots of parts where she says we need more time together, but those were always nights the girls were up too late or we fell asleep with either D, and never connected.

So these statements in text were almost like that unloading but instead of them being when she walked in the door they were once in a while during the day.

hard for her to concentrate and work when i did it.

and then i'd forget to apologize or talk about it by the evening and it wouldn't be resolved.

I said things like "i don't have what it takes to be a parent" and things like that.

i was worried it would go here and now it has.

anyone have experience with this or know how much weight they hold?

in the same texts my wife says "everyone thinks I am insane - I probably think I am but I am not insane to remember what happened."

and so it begins.