Please read Sandi's rules every single day and live those rules. "11. Do not say "I Love You" (It is being "pushy" and trying to make your spouse say it back to you......he/she will despise you for it.)" Read that several times. She will DESPISE you for it. She HATES when you say ILY. You're trying to make up for months/ years of not saying it, but it is the wrong time for that. To her it is just you trying to get your way, being controlling and manipulative.
Quote:
I don't want you to think I just gave up. I let you know what I needed and you couldn't give it to me. I cried for months. Then I hit my breaking point when my future career was being impacted.
That is straight out of DB's first chapter. Michele talks about the mindset of a WAS and that is it right there. Here's the thing, plenty of marriages have been saved even after such words were exchanged. When LBS's hear these things they give up hope, but that is purely a reflection of how she feels right NOW. She may feel completely different months or years from now. Let go of her. Quit trying to pressure her and negotiate with her. You may not think you are, but you are definitely hanging desperately onto that rope.
