Walkaway wife

[jjal]

I go to about 4 out of 5 family get togethers with her family. If it continues for much longer, they'll notice. She never comes to any for my family because she is allergic to animals, and they all have animals. Major holidays are the exception -- 4th of July, T-Giving, X-Mas is with us. So, they are used to not seeing her.

Today she surprised me with "Hope you had a good weekend. I'm coming by the house at lunch to pick up a few things." I went home for an early lunch and cleaned up a bit. She also got to see her closet emptied for the 1st time. She said she was sorry I had to move all of that stuff, and that the house was so clean. I was always very neat and clean. Probably longest chain of emails back and forth we've had since it all went down 5 weeks ago.

In all of that, I told her that I hoped she did good at her race on Saturday, and hoped her parents were doing great. A slight 180 suggested as a mod to the LRT by my DB coach Denise. Apparently the lack of "support" for triathlons/marathons was a sticking point when she walked away. Oddly enough, looking at old emails and text messages, that's not the case. I always asked how she did and that usually brought out more questions, I just wasn't at the finish line cheering her along.

Then, she went on to say she needed to come by and get some kitchen items because she changed her furnished apartment lease -- apparently different levels of "furnished". Probably needs pots and pans and coffee maker. I responded and asked what she needed, I'd box it up for her.

In the 13-14 emails back and forth, I was very calm. She said thank you a lot. It almost sounded sad on her part. I guess the detaching is starting to work.

Tomorrow, I have another DB call with Denise. I hope I'm doing the right things, but being patient really is difficult when you know an emotional affair and a whole new cast of "friends" are guiding her. Getting a life, starting to move on!