FIDO - Changing the Rules - Pt 3

[PeterV2]

Hi NH. I spent this weekend reading your whole story from day 1. I think it was Wonka who suggested I do. (Thanks Wonka).

We have many similarities in our sitches. Mine has been about 10 months longer and it was a PA but seems we're both in about the same place.

I haven't told W about S. I'm not going to do a "grand pronouncement". I'm going to get my ducks in a row and pull the trigger. I'm living in a marriage with no physical affection, no hugs, kisses yet alone sex. Been like that for a year. We did go to MC about a year ago but she walked out angrily.

But today she cooked me a gourmet meal but nothing for herself as she wasn't hungry. Afterward she said she was thinking of going for IC with our MC again.

To me these are crumbs she's throwing me hoping I see them as stuffed turkeys. (I liked that one)

Your W is throwing you crumbs too - "tearfully apologizing to me for the verbal beatings she had given me over the last year. She then went on and on about how proud she was of me for the changes I've undergone the last few months....my energy, my outlook, my positivity, my strength."

Don't take the bait. Until she commits to getting OM out of her head it's all smoke and mirrors. And I think the only way that will happen if at all will be when she sees your backside walking out the door suitcase in hand.

As for my sitch, I'll get her business to a point where it'll sell and once the deal closes I'll pull out my investment and get myself new digs. In the meantime it's limboland, PMA, GAL and self-improvement time. I can see myself moving in October.

As for your sitch, your flight training business is a good focus. Work on a budget for your accommodations. Make a plan, put it on paper (don't let W see it) and put the plan into action. You and I may be moving out at the same time.

Is there any way you can buy a rental house with income potential and rent it out to students, keeping a suite for yourself. Puts you in the drivers seat.

NH, your struggles are close to my heart. Our Ws need to figure their own problems out on their own. Keep up the PMA and GAL activities and don't let the spew get you down. I have a whole closet of spew jackets from the Starky Colletion that are well worn and cleaned regularly. You truly have the pros on your team with Sandi, Starsky, and Wonka just to mention a few.

Cheers