BEC, Well, it does sound like she wants the entire cake to eat for herself. The first draft is always "going for the gold", so it's time to sit down and figure out what can work for you, especially since you are the one working two jobs.
One thing that really stood out for me is the life insurance policies. Before putting her name as beneficiary on your policy, I would ask about whether you can name your children as the beneficiaries, i.e., 50/50 instead of your wife. The reason I mention is that there are times when a wife is named as the beneficiary and when a death occurs, the children do not see the money...the parent does ensure that the children receive it. So, to make it easy for you and your children, name them, not your wife. Notice how your wife isn't putting you as the beneficiary on her proposed policy? That should tell you something about where her mind is right now.
As for the vehicle in your name, well...since you are moving forward w/the divorce, I think it's time she gets her crappy car back since it's in her name and you reclaim your car, the one that you've been paying on. No court of law will stop you from repossessing your car. Whatever you do, don't agree to what she is suggesting about the cars because she's trying to get everything she can from you right now. She's hoping that you feel so low, miserable and guilty that she can put everything on the line and you'll agree w/her terms. I also think that her friend, family and the lawyer are whispering in her ear to take you to the cleaners and/or clean your clock. Don't fall for this old trick. Besides, she must have some money if she's filed and wants a life insurance policy. So, she can come up w/some money for a nicer car, even if it's a leased one. Trust me, she got money or someone is giving her funds to file, etc.
Please do not allow your heart to dictate the terms of your agreement. This is a business partnership that has gone south. Trust me, if the shoe was on the other foot, she wouldn't be so generous towards you. They want everything they can get and leave us w/a tin cup in our hands begging for money and do not care if we have a roof over our heads. It's all about "me, me and more me". Time to think about YOU for a change and what you need to live on comfortably and take care of your kids.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
