PP's New Adventure (5) - Filing & Moving Forward

[PigPen]

Thanks Dif. I went through a lot of the same stuff. I started and closed two businesses in the few years I was married, all the while building my main business up. All the while doing side projects up the wazoo.

It was WAY too much work and definitely took me out of my M. I was not present even when I was present. Vacations were spent flatlining for three or four days and then trying to recover for the rest of the week.

I financed all of it with a ton of caffeine during the day and then drugs etc to sleep/destress at night. But, we had bills to pay. And more bills to pay. And the only way that I saw to take care of that was to keep working and keep trying new ventures. In hindsight it was not the best way to go. Moronic actually but it was the only way I knew. I didn't ever think BD was possible, and would tell my W to just hang int here until we turned the corner. That all couples fresh out of school were struggling.

Thought we were on the 80 year plan too and that the first few years would just be hard. That nothing good comes easy.

My W didn't leave me because my businesses failed, but I know how ridiculously (medically) run down I was before she left. My doctor had told me to consider taking six months off if I could. Unfortunately I went from that advice to BD...no rest for the weary.

I currently own a very unique gym, but also have private clients all over that are trying to lose significant amounts of weight - usually over 50 pounds. I'm selling the gym to my partner, keeping the private clients and working on a book. I've written a blog for our business for six years...every single day. Oddly enough for a small business we have over 6,000 visits to the blog per month. Not big numbers but not bad for an entity with only 200 clients and no other outreach.

BD truly shook me up, but it also made all of the areas of my life that weren't really working more evident. When my partner asked me about selling only a week after BD, I knew something bigger was happening in my life (or that's what I told myself to stay sane).

Next year is going to be another interesting one. I'm considering selling most of my stuff (I don't have much any more), packing up my car and driving across country to get material for the book. I'm switching from writing the gym blog to a blog on my own website and would have the time of my life getting stories from people. Would be an adventure as scary as it also sounds.

As awful as BD was, it definitely opened the door of possibility for me. Now to use it both for my highest form of expression and in a way that will benefit the most people.

This S has been awful, and I miss my W everyday. I'm still sort of stuck at the point where the more amazing I see the rest of my life, the more I wish she could still be a part of it, you know? We went through the struggle together but never got to benefit from that struggle. That still breaks my heart.

Thanks for the hug, I hope you're having a peaceful weekend.

PP