LBS becomes the WS. The price of peace.

[dwh15]

Great post Pyrite. I haven't read up on your whole sitch yet, but plan on checking it out. I can understand what you're saying. I'm about 5 months out from DDay, and my WW left to live with OM as well. I'm not quite as detached as you YET, but see myself getting there. Like you, I've found myself thinking about other women, and even went on a date about a month ago, but felt so guilty the entire time I didn't enjoy myself. I even feel guilty sometimes when I feel myself letting go because I know that after I give up, it really is over for good.

I think it can be helpful to understand how someone could fall into the trap of an A. We are all human and make mistakes, huge ones. And I also agree that it's good to forgive, so that you don't carry around that anger. But I would stop short of validating the decision to have an A. There is NO reason anyone should ever cross that line, no matter how bad things seem in their M. If a person is that unhappy, they should seek help, talk with their partner, do whatever is necessary to fix the M. Then, if all else fails, you proceed with D, knowing you gave it your all. And you don't get involved with another person until the M is officially over.

I'm happy that you seem to be detached from the sitch and able to start moving ahead with your life. I hope that however things work out, you find happiness.