XMIL is probably just concerned for her son and can see what a mess his life is and also probably knows better than he does what he has sacrificed.
The advice she gave is good, but your response was better. You need to live your life and if he ever gets his act together then you can see where your heart is.
Until then enjoy your life and leave H to wallow in his, with you giving him as little thought as possible (easier said than done I know)
I hope you have a great weekend.
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
