I've been on unemployment (again at my wife's urging I took my job search a lot slower than I ever have) and had to go into some office today to turn in paperwork. I left the house a little after W and I had our brief convo validating her feelings and admitting I was wrong. She gave me a hug and kiss goodbye this morning.
I got a text saying she would be really busy at work today. My head starts spinning, my pulse quickens, and my heart hurts. This was code over the last few months for don't bother talking to me today I am seeing the OM I have come to realize. I try not to panic and borrow trouble, but how can I help it.
A little while later she texts about frustrations at work. I commiserate by talking about how silly this meeting is and how it is a total waste of time for everyone involved. I am a recruiter, I know how to find a job. As the morning goes on I hear from her every hour or so. I am elated because she is taking the time to reach out to me again and share her day with me. This is something that hasn't happened in months.
I am going on Saturday to get more work done on a tattoo and she has been planning on coming with me. After Tuesday I wasn't so sure. I asked if she was still up for it and she said yes, and suggested we go for a run together before the apt.
I think I did the right thing this morning and am glad I didn't wait longer, but hope it wasn't the wrong move. It seems to have helped, but I go from hopeful to hopeless and distraught so often I don't know what to think anymore. I think she is still in withdraw from the OM and maybe that is part of why she isn't following through with some of our plans for reconciliation, but she is doing other things that I haven't said anything about that really show a change. Argh!
M: 36 yo W: 36 yo S: 7 D: 4 M: 13 yrs BD: 6/14 (??) PE Confirmed 7/15 (4 months) The road to recovery starts now
