Went to my first day of technical training for the new job today. I'm torn - I love the company, the culture, and the people. But the job itself? I hate. It's really more technical and requires more troubleshooting, setup, and break down than I was led to believe. I won't like it.
Have you ever read the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People? It's a really great book and in part of it Covey hits on how important attitude is to being successful at anything in life. If you go in with the attitude you described above then you will indeed HATE it. But, perhaps a slight attitude adjustment would make all the difference. All the above, that doesn't sound like a reason to hate it, it sounds like a great learning experience! Vow to spend 6 months being as good at it as you can, and THEN evaluate whether it's for you or not. You can't decide that when you're still in training, that just shows a lack of patience, which incidentally you need a ton of for your M anyway
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I'm also quite frankly convinced I'm going to screw up at some point
If there is one thing I learned from BD and D it's this- the things you worry about never happen. It's the things you don't worry about that bite you in the butt. I worried about all kinds of stuff, my M was the only thing in my life that was solid and stable, it was my rock. The stuff I worried about all worked out. My M imploded. So quit worrying and just take things a day at a time and do the best you can.
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Will absence and distance make the heart grow fonder, or help her completely forget me?
She needs time and space and lots of it. So in that regard it would help your sitch. It's more likely (over a long period of time) to make her miss you then forget you. But you do have to weigh that against the negative impact it might have on your access to the kids.
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Does going back to school make me look stronger to her? Should I even be thinking about these sorts of things, or just go with what I think is best for me?
For right now she's not going to care. It'll make no difference. Read Sandi's thread for input from a former WAW on what your W is feeling right now:
So do it for you, not her. At some point months or years from now she may see it as something positive, but for now it just doesn't matter. You should take a long-term approach, make changes to yourself and give her time to believe them.
