Could do with some help please to understand my wife? I tried a variation of the ultimate loss (variation because I cannot call her a real WW or WAS) but it did shake her to the core. Last update today was it was my Bday on Sunday and today she gave me a bracelet she had ordered. I said thanks and gave it back as I have never used bracelets in a long time even though it looked nice. I know it may sound callous but she has a history of making me return presents even when my son was younger standing there watching his mother open the present to pull a face and said she didnt want it because she never uses it or doesnt like it or it was too expensive and make me return it. So much so she took the ilusion of giving presents in the house away from us. we on the other hand do the polite thing, thanks and treasure it. This is not a revenge tactic but at this moment I really do not have the time, patience or mood to be correct. Just real.
After viewing your posts I think you know much better than me what goes through a woman's mind... I dont
I think what Cadet is trying to say is.....If it wasnt a revenge tactic, then wth was it?
Seemed a little tit for tat to me.
Hang in there bud
T14 M5 SD15,D8,S6,D3 "Not Happy" 12/11/14 EA discovered 2/11/15 MC started 2/17/15 MC "put on hold" 4/3/15 W IC started 4/5/15 PA admitted 5/7/15 WW moves out 5/8/15 WW gets her own place 7/15/15
I think I know where the problem is. If you didnt read the previous posts I put then it could lead to confusion.
The objective is to try and keep her but not at any price and not wait for her. As I said in previous posts the focus on myself did make changes to the point she thought I had OW or was close to. We did grow closer and share some nice moments. The problem is the physical barrier. She will not get into any sort voluntarily. Result is it is back to square one only now we do interact more but 0 physical interaction of any sort. Neither when we argued did she or does she clearly say I want in or I want out. Loving Icons are also a no no from her.
I told her my feelings and decision and she got emotional and even posted lines of a song I love on her whatsapp profile. She has the key but wont use it so I have given up trying.
The only thing is that the same way we miss those signs things are going wrong at the beginning I dont want to miss those signs she is trying neither while caught up in my self focus.
Distancing yourself as a strategy may be good so long as you have clear if you want to lose the objective or not.
Try to keep her but with changes in how our marriage was and how it should be. Also not wait for her to take forever. Result... I start getting on with my life but not lose sight of her indications she is beginning to take those steps.
