MLC leads to EA and WAW

[HurtHus]

We are both 36. I use the term MLC carefully, but she really seems to be hitting the criteria pretty well. She is hitting the gym with a renewed intensity, getting braces, got her first tattoo, is distancing herself from old friends and making a whole new circle of friends. It's almost as if she were trying to reinvent herself. After a few calls and talking to my wife my DB coach said she's a combo of WAW and MLC that led to the affair. I see now I'm using the wrong abbreviation since she was in a PA with the OM.

She is being totally transparent, but texts can be deleted before she comes home from work, but she is also calling me throughout the day at lunch and other points of the day to "check-in" so I know she isn't out meeting the OM. It is a really confusing time for me because some of what she is doing suggests she is serious about ending the affair and working on us, but other behavior (not following through on our "homework" or being open to discuss what we are supposed to be discussing) leads me to believe she isn't really in this. And therein lies the challenge for DBing this. I'm not certain what approach to take aside from improving myself and detaching. I'm working on GALing, but until I find a new job (I was laid off in June) it is sort of tough to do much financially.