Co dependency H Affairs O my Must DETATCH

[Zues126]

I feel like if I detatch it will be the end because I am the only one who cares.

4, first of all, good on you to keep posting. I know you feel like you're going in circles...I guess that's what you need for a while to learn. As painful as this is, it's life teaching you what you need to know to have a better future.

I quoted one line I see a lot. You feel like if you detach it will be the end. Guess what? It has already ended. You are in severe, severe denial.

Look at it this way- if he moved out, remarried a new woman, didn't talk to you anymore, and years went by...I think we'd all agree it was over.

Now- suppose you said 'no it isn't, I won't stop trying, I'm not going to let it end!!!' so you sent him love letters, presents, naked pictures, drove by his house, and had an airplane spell 'I love you' in the sky overhead...would that change the fact that it was over?

No! In that case the R would be WELL over, and you'd be a psychotic ex that had stalker issues!

Moral of the story, clinging to a failed relationship doesn't prevent reality from being real.

Your R has failed. That's the reality. Being the person that clings to it doesn't do much good for you or your family. Let it go and face that is HAS ended, and become a stronger woman, someone that can lead your children, and someone that can be capable of a good future relationship...or even facing life on your own if them's the cards you get.