Newbie needing support and advice

[lonelee]

Ep2015
Im sorry you are having such a hard time. We all our. Although I am not in your shoes exactly with D talk happening there are things in your post I can certainly relate to.

Like crying for days..out of the blue. I think thats reality or mourning of the relationship you had. I dont want that relationship back it was broken. I want a new and improved relationship w/ or w/o my spouse.

Trying not to look at my phone every 5 minutes.. tough one here , esp when I should be working..

The tight feeling in your chest and its hard to breath and your all nerved up.. yeah that stinks. I walked around like that for the better of 3 months before we seperated and before I GAL and started doing DB. Now I feel I have more control over my emotions. Keeping busy helps the incessent dwelling on things.

If your H hasnt told you exactly what his angle is are there things that you know of that were not as you wanted them to be? I know for us we didnt fight either and non confrontational but I now recognize that we werent communicating either. We werent sharing good or bad. I was lonley with him right beside me because we werent sharing our wishes wants or needs. No intamacy that way.

For me im trying to work on things from my angle because those I can work on and change myself. Ultimately I think we wanted the same things but didnt express them in ways that were understood by the other.

I hope this is a little helpful. If nothing more than you know your not alone here. Good luck to you. Talk soon.