Glad to hear someone's cleaning my house. . I know I have said this before and I'm going to say it again. I am impressed in your transformation from the Joe who first arrived here. It has been a painful road. You have grown b/c you saw you deserved better and stood up for yourself and your children. Your experience can be helpful to others who have a WW.
Take legal action to get those kids out of that mess.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Glad to hear someone's cleaning my house. . I know I have said this before and I'm going to say it again. I am impressed in your transformation from the Joe who first arrived here. It has been a painful road. You have grown b/c you saw you deserved better and stood up for yourself and your children. Your experience can be helpful to others who have a WW.
Take legal action to get those kids out of that mess.
Thank you Sandi! You have been a great help to me and my journey. Your threads are a lifesaver. The posts you made to me in the beginning really helped me to change the way I approached my situation.
I do feel like I deserve better. I deserve to be in a healthy relationship. I have admitted my wrongs and I am still changing them. But like I said all along I take my vows seriously. But I will not share my wife. There is only so much lying a person can take. And then when you add the affair, it's a whole different ball game. I was asked that question on this forum. " Is cheating a deal breaker for me " Absolutely. I applaud the people that try to work through the affairs. But I am not one of those people. Keeping the road paved smooth works both ways. If she would have just left with no lies or adultery I would have been willing to work on the marriage if she wanted to one day.
I am careful with what I post to other LBS. To be honest, I have become a little hardcore with some of this. I would not put up with some of the things others are putting up with on here. I don't want to say the wrong thing to someone. If I had to do it over again, I would have kicked my W out when she started doing the phone sex job. I would have given the ultimatum the job or me. I am able to say that now. I was not strong enough back then. I don't like that at all. I used to be that guy who was strong enough.
Adultery is biblical grounds for divorce. I think affairs are to easy now a days with internet, dating sites and cell phones. My personal opinion, now that I have become the man I want to be, is zero tolerance! I think the more these types of spouses keep getting away with little things, the more they will push the envelope. There are plenty of good, loyal people out in the world. I deserve someone like that and so does the people here.
Right now I am all about my kids. That special someone will show up when the time is right. And STBXW will wake up one day and say what did I do?? Lost the best thing that happened to me!! I have received a call from every serious relationship I have been in. Sometimes months, sometimes years. But they say the same thing. That they messed up and that I was good to them. Oh well, too late! Had your chance!!
And that is all I have to say about that!!! ( for right now) I am off to the golf course!! Wonka, I will check out some sexy legs for you!! And me of course!!
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
I see you with a little Starsky style. You are you and frankly it doesn't hurt some posters to have a little ' tell it as it is". I often think my style is too soft, maybe you can compensate for V!
If this is authentic to you, be you and post your thoughts with honest compassion. I often don't post where I know a harder line is needed. You have much to offer to others as your journey has been uphill sometimes.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
Thank you for posting on my thread. It meant a lot to me!
I believe you started this second thread stating that you hope it will be the start of building your future for your children and yourself. Like Sandi, I have noticed big changes from the Joe who first joined DB. You seem to be on the right path.
Keep your chin up and stick with your plan. I have faith in you that you can do this. Remember what I almost always write...keep a PMA and GAL.
Your friend,
Bob
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
You're welcome, Joe! You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Me:55 yrs/W:51 yrs (has MS) M:14 yrs T:15 yrs No children together--3 each from previous marriages Wife Moved Out: 10/19/14 Wife Filed for Divorce: 10/20/14 Divorce Final: 10/21/15
Hi Bob, you are such a busy man with all your GALing and send joy and love here in DBland. Thank you for taking time to stop by thread and wish me well and offer me a prayer. You do so much good here, you are a blessing x 1000.
. I know I have said this before and I'm going to say it again. I am impressed in your transformation from the Joe who first arrived here. It has been a painful road. You have grown b/c you saw you deserved better and stood up for yourself and your children. Your experience can be helpful to others who have a WW. 