Recovery from cancer and separation

[shotgun]

I have to admit Rouky that I am struggling. My new job is very physical in nature and I am very tired at the end of the day. They have been very accommodating however. Everyone there knew of my illness when they hired me.

I have realized since W moved out that W did not want me hanging out with my family and friends and I am now reconnecting with them and having a lot of fun. It's funny that it was her who claimed that she had lost all of her friends during our marriage but what I remember is her having her friends come to stay with us fairly frequently. It was something that I encouraged her to do and I always enjoyed them being here.

I think it is more of a case that she threw everything into raising S13 and she spent about eleven years totally absorbed with spoiling and focusing on him. During that time S13 was a complete momma's boy and they were inseparable. About two and a half years ago it flipped and he suddenly wanted to spend all of his time with me. At that time everything changed. She started to dress differently, became very depressed about her job and started to complain bitterly that I would do nothing to change her situation. I would try to convince her to stop trying to live like a rock star and start to live a more simple life and we wouldn't need the incredible income that her job provided. Ultimately she informed me that she wanted someone to financially care for her. I simply couldn't replace her $200,000 a year job.

When she started running the bars, the men she was hanging around were all older, very successful guys. I have done my best to not pay attention to what she does but it just always pops up. The attorney that I hired said "Oh I know her, she's the one that hangs out at ........ and flirts with all the old guys".

This is all so gut wrenching but I know that I will be better off someday. I will have my health back and I will find someone who returns my love. Our son will be fine if I can do the right thing and keep my focus on him.

Thank you for your interest Rouky.