Sunny you are right he doesn't do much to help anymore and I'm not sure I understand why except that I allow it! I was sleeping and I am sure that would be his excuse he didn't want to wake me but in the past that hasn't been a problem! As for arrangements for pick up yes he could have messaged her also I usually pick her up and drop her off so I do most of the communicating with her mom. Again I have allowed it as to have control and be co dependent to feel needed helpful ect. Am I ok with him sleeping with us both no absolutely not im working towards being strong enough to say no but also scared of pushing him away further. Living through fear. I am not sure if it is getting me closer to where I want to be which is having a happy healthy family with H or if it is more of the same and allowing him to cake eat. I am sure more towards the second. I will keep working towards becoming stronger so I can say no. I certainly do not feel forced and in a way enjoy it but it is certainly not the same as it was before! I'm not sure how to explain it. I am working on detachment not letting his roller coaster affect me and his actions affect me this shall be a long hard road as I am very co dependent! I am excited that I found the co dependent no more on you tube as an audio so I can listen to it until I am able to afford it. So far I feel I am reading my own story except my H is not an alcoholic! I need to take responsibility for my actions to and how I allow him to do what he does just like I said before I allow him to not do the communicating because I just do it!
