Just been trying to give my W as much space as I can
Been at work most of the day then I get home do some house work and make the boys tea W and eldest D are going out for a meal tonight TBH I find my days are all pretty much the same
this^^ is YOUR Life and you are responsible for changing it. Why are all your days the same?
Ghost, YOU have to change your life and yourself. There is no way around that. What are the obstacles to this?
where as I used to
Get up leave for work before kids were awake and then get home at 4 take S to his tennis get home for arround 8 Play a couple of games on the computer Sometimes chat to W sometimes not so much Then bed ...not much of a life
Now Get up do some housework make breakfast for those that wish to be downstairs go to work come home play with kids for a bit then I might do bath time and bed time with youngest and then tidy house a little more then bed so even now I think ...no wonder our M went down hill I really do not know when we were suppost to do the fun things You are not alone in this situation but the thing is, you CAN do a lot more than you are seeing.
So now I am advised to GAL and focus on me and I get this but during the M I used to go out twice a week and play tennis and do things for me and not as a couple one of the things my W said I put myself and my hobbies before her and her needs....can't change this now it contradicts what you described above, ^^, btw.
So working on detaching and putting my focus into spending more quality time with my children
GAL is NOT the same as spending more time with the children, it's called parenting.
It's valuable for you and the kids. True, it's pretty darn important to their mothers - and it's a turn on to see your children lovingly interact with their father.
But it's for the children AND YOU that you are more involved.
Maybe you can schedule something with the younger ones,
and figure out what the older ones would enjoy doing on a 2 x a month basis*** (***I can't speak for your older kids obviously, but I've found they usually are not as interested in "dad time" as the younger ones are. But they'll do it if it's not too much. This varies!)
But for GAL ---
You need to JOIN something or EXPLORE something or STUDY something or COACH something or VOLUNTEER somewhere or WORK somewhere....
meet new people who do Not know your situation and CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
The sooner the better. That's also for your children to see b/c you are modeling for them
what a man of strength and honor does when he's facing a huge setback.
Do you curl up in the fetal position and whine
OR
do you make the needed changes and adapt to your new life as you direct it the way you want it to go?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
