You are stronger now in the R you have with yourself. I've come to learn more about me in the last 30 days, than really in my lifetime.
Tonight, I am sad, but I'm ok. I'm starting to let go (SLOWLY) and understand the issues I cannot control and those I can. And being honest with myself. Some said, accurately, it is about drawing the spouse back, not pulling them. If you pull them, they resist, if you are open to them coming back, then you can let go of the anger and frustration and sadness and focus on yourself and family.
And I realize at this moment, this is what I have been doing, resisting myself. Fighting, worrying, agonizing, worrying over events of which I have no control. Wow, typing it out, I begin to see it. I may have imagined it, but I felt now something go through me. Not a jolt or an epiphany, but a subtle, quiet change. Not a moment of clarity, but a moment of recognition.
I was about to write, there are more bad days ahead, but I am ready. You know what? From this moment forward, there are NO more bad days.
