Hi Sunny! That is a question I am not sure exactly how to answer. I guess I always thought it was because I loved him but now I am learning on here it may be more a need than want. I will have to dig deep for that answer. The crazy thing is I told myself I would never live like this. I continue reminding myself that this is not what I want to teach my daughter. I feel like I am doing ok with GAL. I have been out more in the last two weeks than in a year. A friend and I are committing to going out anytime we are asked no matter what. I am no longer just going to sit at home waiting on him. Its not a life. I will also be doing more with our kids. No more just sitting around. Something makes me think he is enjoying me being gone all the time though. BUT he has not had to watch the kids yet due to my plans. I guess I hope if I change he will change also but I already know I can not control him or if he changes I can only control me. I have been trying to live this week as If he was not even here live as if I was living alone. Working extra hours cleaning instead of asking for help ect. I think emotional well being will be better achieved if I can completly detatch and not pursue. Today my goal is to get all of the cleaning, housework and budget for next month done. If I have time he asked me to come to garage but I will only do that after I get MY stuff done. No more making time for him. I will only have time for him if I HONESTLY have time. I need to get kids registered for school and all that good stuff also. Zeus told me to make small daily achievable goals. So getting stuff done and not going out of my way for him is a goal. I did send a few pursuing messages today but I will NOT send anymore messages period even if he texts me first. I have the kids at home so he will need nothing unless he wants me to do something and then I will decide if I should do it or not. Is it in my best interest? Unless it is at home or in a town I want to go to answer is NO!
