It's been a bit of a busy weekend so not had time to come here and post.
Nothing to say at the moment really. It's all gone quiet again. I doubt it'll last. In fact I know it won't last but there isn't any reason for WW or I to speak to each other at the moment.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
Yea. Quiet here. They know that no amount of L letters is going to speed up the process and there is no way I'm backing down on anything less than 50% custody of S9 so there isn't any point in them badgering me. It's just a waste of energy.
I expect this to change soon though. Once the pension valuations are in it'll be full steam ahead.
Funny, she's still not done a thing about the bills. Not even asked me to pay it in full. Wonder why?
Anyway getting used to the single life.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
All the assets need to be split before the court will agree the legal separation or the divorce. This includes the pensions. Your pension valuation is considered a liquid asset to they don't physically touch your pension pot. The money is only considered for the M timeframe. Once that calculation is done then an amount goes to whomever is entitled.
Same with the house. And the car. And all the furniture.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
Here is a surprise(not). The WAS always think they will just get what they want. Sure, my WW thought she would buy me out, then she didn't want that and took it off the table (i was at my brothers at the time), then she offered to buy me out again, then that was off the table and back to selling up. Then after I moved back in it was explosion time and onto the L's. Because she's not getting her own way she's not happy.
It's the same with the bills I mentioned earlier and how she's not made a move to change things into my name. I know it's mind reading but I firmly believe she thinks I will move out. She doesn't believe I would arrange for me to buy her out so she's leaving everything as is so that it's not a pain for her when she moves back.
But it's not going to play out like that. I've seen some of your comments on the noobs threads and I agree with you. The initial BD is a nightmare none of us are prepared for. And yes, we are weak at that point but your strength does come back. And the more you do for yourself the more your confidence begins to return. This is of course subject to the person that finds themselves here and the condition of the M in the first place.
I was just reading Ghost's thread and the same thing came up about how long his W was unhappy for. I got the same. Did I have a clue? Nope. No clue. But there you go. History can be rewritten after all.
Me:43 Her:42 M:14 S:9 EA started 2014/03 (or there abouts) PA started 2014/05/30 BD:2014/11/05 I left 2015/10/01 I returned 2015/05/02 She left 2015/06/10 OM still on the go.
Just offering some advice to newbies. I'm no expert, but after 18 long, long weeks, I think I can spot a few things that I/We've been through and try and throw a bone their way before they wade in with a mistake.
I'll check out Ghost's thread.
M 45 W 52 SD22 S9 D8 BD 6 April 2015 Not living together 4 Dec 2015
