Just a thought for you. There's Another book might shed some light on your husbands response. This one is by Harley. His needs - her needs. It is kinda similar vein as 5LL insofar as this helps open you eyes to things your spouse might be wanting from marriage. There are some other things in this book like the love bank concept...but the topic for this conversation is what men are looking for out of marriage.
One of them is to have an attractive spouse. Now I read this and thought well BS. I still think my wife is as beautiful as the day I met her (not that she will agree on bit, if I pulled back I can see where she is coming from, but deep down i don't care to think any other way).
Rereading this section, I can understand better what he was going for. When my wife gets dressed up for a wedding (still almost no makeup mind you...va-vva-va vroom). Ya that was missing for a long time. The extra effort to look at her best. We had kids and we let our selves get into that comfortable groove. I get that.
Anyway...your description of H's reaction to your apology made me think of that instantly.
Maybe worth picking up if you run out of books to read
