Some of that which WW says is irrationality. So you are sadly going have to deal with the irrational, probably for quite a long time. And unfairness and although it hurts and you did not deserve this irrationality there are never guarantees with a wayward spouse. It's the expectation of fairness that gets us and there isn't any.
You can deal with irrationality by validation and then saying "There is much that you are saying I don't agree with so we will have to disagree. My children come first for me as I know they do for you so we need to find workable solutions, and I know it can be worked out".
Your feelings don't count in this. I think I would make this your 180 with WW, to study ways of dealing with the irrational. You could start with Albert Ellis and some of his expectation theory principles. He has three main principles and one of them is the expectation that life is fair.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
