Thanks ForeverYoung and Deja for all the kind words.
It was so hard to remain calm. But worth it because I learned so much. Now I see why the detaching is key. Otherwise I would check myself into an insane asylum.
Spending days w/H I realize his emotions are definitely heightened. If he hears live music he seems to come alive and really "feel it." It think the bustle of vacation fills him up too. I think there is an emptiness there that he is desperately looking to fill.
Being on vacation w/him I think H is starting to trust my decision making more. He makes a lot of mistakes/seems confused. Often he can't remember where a store we just went to is. I am kindly helping him. He questioned if I was right in all these instances but now he defers to me almost always in such matters. Like a child.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
