Hey! I want in on the sloppy drunk stuff and the circus...oh wait, what am I saying?
Luke, you are ok in my book. You have walked this with honesty and courage. You looked all the cr@p in the face and are working through it.
I can totally understand about the physical part and the STD. Who the heck wants to have to think about that?
My xh slept with his OW on our 25th wedding anniversary. Man, that hurt.
But he did what he did. Could he have chosen differently? Hel!z yea, but, he didn't.
I realized that whatever happened with her couldn't taint the years we had together. What we had was real. It was based on love and a commitment. Whatever happened between them had nothing to do with me really.
She didn't have anything that I didn't have. But I sure had stuff she didn't. She didn't have my integrity, honor or strength. She didn't matter.
I understand the hurt you feel from the affair. I decided during all of it that allowing myself to continue to hold onto all those feelings was weighing me down. It was stopping me from moving forward. I was giving her my power.
You are getting to where you need to be. Allowing those feelings to wash over you more and more.
It helps to remember that she wasn't doing that TO you. She was trying to fix herself.
