Today my wife continued to text me about trival stuff. Asking about my oldest daughter putting my youngest daughter on her cell phone plan. Asking me if I was going to my daughter's softball tourney next week, Asking if I received an email from softball coaches wife. She never texts me much anymore. We used to text hundreds of times per day. It's strange, almost like she is trying to start a conversation.
Wife called yesterday about my daughter acting out.... wonder why? Conversation was good no arguing and she was nice and not mean. Later my daughter texted and said her mom wanted to know if I could take her and some friends to a concert. It is a group my wife used to really like and she follows the female lead singer on instagram. I text my wife and asked her why she wasnt going and she says she may have plans that weekend. That just drives me crazy. I hate not knowing what she is doing. We used to do everything together and had no secrets. I guess she can do it because I have done it as well. The difference is I am not texting and calling another man.
Another text from my wife today. She is going to visit her mother for her birthday and then back to attend our nephew's wedding. That's four days in a row. She just talks about things that she could tell me once I return home. Dont know if she is just trying to make conversation or what
That is a good sign. Your responses should be short and business like. Remember you have this great new life and are moving forward! Your too busy to get into lengthy conversations.
Me: 33 W: 30 T - 12 M - 3 K - 0 BD - 6/14/15 Moved out - 6/14/15
Thats exactly what I was doing. She called me about my daughter acting out and we talked but not too long. I have been very to the point or answering the question only. I went to sea world and the riverwalk and put pictures on social media about what a good time I was having. One of the times she texted me at the end she said Relax, enjoy and have fun. That really confused me. My oldest daughter texted her tonight and told her that she has broken her heart. My wife told her that the situation is not between her and my daughter but between her and me. What my wife doesn't understand is that this effects our whole family.
WAW seem to have little concern about the families they have dismantled. My wife doesn't even resemble the woman I married. She does not care about our parents, siblings, dogs, etc. She just seems to care about her own happiness. You are doing well, keep it up!
Me: 33 W: 30 T - 12 M - 3 K - 0 BD - 6/14/15 Moved out - 6/14/15
I'm not doing well. I am an investigator and I put a keylogger on the computer that she sometimes uses. Just before I left I got her facebook password. I saw tonight that they were talking and she was asking him if he wanted to change his mind. I think it was about them getting together. He told her your kids hate me and her response was So..... That just burns me up. I told my 27 year old daughter and she is furious. I think its over. I am seriously thinking about asking for a divorce when I get home next week. It's not what I want but I see the writing on the wall
If not, sit on it. Start reading some of the threads of folks that have been here for a while. If you don't want one, don't get one. Start DB'ing. It's a hell of a process, but you're going to go through hell anyway. The only difference is the shape you're going to come out in.
Sorry to hear you're struggling. This place is where the miserable come to commiserate. However, we're all in it together and we're all here for the same reason - to save our marriages.
From your registration date you haven't even begun to DB yet, you couldn't. You're too new to the game. Breathe, get some distance, figure out what's best for you and you alone right now and get on that.
Keep posting too.
PP
M 39 W 36 T5 M3 BD - 1/15 Separated - Same Day Served 9/15 D finalized 6/17
I have been trying to do 180. Early on I allowed her to pull me back in and I told her I loved her and wanted to work it out but for the last month I have not let her pull be back. I do not want a divorce but how do I stop it if she is planning on being with another man?
I found this site about 2 months ago and I am afraid that I ruined it before I found this site. I did all the things that are wrong, I cried begged, pleaded. I also tracked her phone and followed her and busted her. I told our daughters about her EA and now our oldest (really my step daughter) will not talk to her. They have exchanged a few texts but they have not been good. She blames me for turning her daughter against her even though our daughter has told her I have my own mine and what you are doing is wrong. I hope I can recover.
