Lou - get a roommate to share the apartment and expenses. Look at the Mr Money Mustache website for ideas on how to trim your expenses so that you can start a little savings. You're wise not to tie yourself down to a longer lease at present. Take some time to build up a little nest egg, then you can decide where to go in the future.
I feel your pain about S18, but he IS an adult, and sometimes they have to make their own mistakes before they can grow up. All 3 of mine struggled after the divorce, but they are finally getting things together a few years later.
I'm sorry to hear about your father and brother - why don't they respond to you? When did your troubles with those relationships begin? Do you have cousins or aunts/uncles you could reach out to instead? Sometimes family iS a comfort, but then again, sometimes it's the friends you make that are LIKE family that really become your family over time.
As for your H - I think you're handling your interactions with him well, although I would have left him wondering a bit about his question about whether you had been with anybody. He doesn't need to know you're trusty Plan B, always waiting. It's be good for him to have to worry a bit about the possibility of you dating. Maybe next time he calls, cut it short, saying you have to get ready to go out dancing with your girlfriend. That'll make him think.
Also - be aware, this may only be a brief moment with your H. He might pop right back into his tunnel, or decide it's better to move on to casual sex with young tramps. Don't let him derail you from keeping the focus on YOUR life. If he's sincerely coming back, HE'LL do the work to make that happen.
