Starsky, I'm in California. Oct 22 would have been 10 years for us. So it can be considered long term.
And I have no family attorney. As mentioned I didn't work aside from some substitute teaching, and so i don't have the financial wherewithal to hire a lawyer.
Most attorneys will give you a free initial consultation, 714. You should meet with two or three, preferably ones that specialize in paternal custody and "men's rights" issues. Some may even be willing to work on a contingency, as it's likely that if your wife works full-time and you are the stay-at-home dad that she will be required to pay at least part of your legal fees, if not all. Again, you can ask about this in your initial free consultation.
Do seek counsel. It doesn't mean you have to file for divorce, or even do ANYTHING at this point other than learn what your rights and responsibilities are. Nearly EVERYONE who does this reports that it's empowering and burden-lifting; it certainly was for me.
