Heather, I wouldn't share too much of what you are doing w/your life w/him. Now, it's a different story when it comes to your daughters.
Of course he doesn't know whether he wants a divorce or not. It's going to cost him more money to move forward. So, what does he want you to do? Stay married to him and he live w/the twinkle twat until he gets old and sitting in a rocking chair in front of the nursing home? Is staying married to you a way to ensure that he has an excuse so that he can't marry her?
If he were unhappy about the situation, he would be doing something about it. He's gotten himself into a mess and quite frankly, he's hoping you'll help him figure things out. It's time for him to grow up, face the consequences of his actions and do the hard, necessary work to earn your trust, as well as your respect. I don't see that happening any time soon...but then again, I may be wrong.
After all that he has done, does he honestly think that by being chatty and friendly w/you, that you'll just drop everything, sweep all of it under the rug and possibly welcome him home with open arms?
I hope that if, and I do mean if, he wakes up and wants to reconcile, that you will stand firm and allow him to do the necessary work to earn your trust. He won't do that if you open the door completely and sweep stuff under the rug.
He is not your problem to fix. I do understand caring for him, but again, you didn't break him, therefore you can't fix him.
