2nd time around part 3

[NotAgainPlease]

Well its been forever since I've been here. Not a lot has changed and a lot has at the same time.
We are not divorced. Stbx says it's my fault. We are using one attorney he hired. I have turned in all that is asked. She hasn't done anything since October. He keeps saying when I bring it up every once in awhile she said she'd contact me.
He is still with the one you left me for and she is still long distance. However she comes up every other weekend to see him. And she says when my kids are there what really bothers me but I guess there's nothing I can do.
We get along for a while and then something is said he doesn't like and the s*** hit. I rarely contact him anymore because he's always so angry. And when I don't contact him then he's nice to me. He now lives down the street closer. I asked my son if I could pick him up and he can help me move something and I bring him right back. He asked his dad and came back and said no its his weekend do it when I have it. So I called my stbx and ask him why I couldn't haven't for a few minutes and bring him right back since technically it was my weekend can I let him come over to go away with him for the weekend. He said I never told him that I told him to tell you we were busy and had to go to town. I've been asked if you could please bring me my check if you. She said fine and he brought my son. My son said to me mom he did tell me that. I asked my stbx he would say that and he said it's none of your damn business what I tell him we were busy. Nice daddy is the frozen cat under the bus. I did not know the girlfriend was here and I have learned that when he is really nasty to it's when she is here or she can hear him talking to me. Otherwise you try to be nice to me especially if I'm ignoring him.
I've learned that he is a narcissist and I am codependent.
I am solely trying to work at this and realize that my relationship really was never good I was always longing for more and wanting something that he could not or would not give to me. I feeling sad a lot especially now when I feel that is girlfriend is taking over my life with my kids. I realize I will always be there mom but it still hurts me to know that they like her even though they know what she did to us.
I have tried to go on dates but I haven't found anyone special yet. I have to finally get over the fact that we will never be back together and even if we were to it would not be right for me.