Finding out who the OM is has been worse than I could have imagined. It use to be a faceless man now he ha a face and everytime I close my eyes I see the pictures of them together. My imagination sees them being intimate. He has some of the things I wanted and could never do because I was busy working two jobs to take care of my family. He had a college degree and he has a great paying job. She's going to divorce me, leaving me broke with paying child support for 5 children and they'll walk into the sunset, with a nice home and financial security. Something I worked so hard to provide for my family.
It's so easy now to see how she can say ILYBINILWY. She's getting those butterflies and endorphins from him now. Of coarse she doesn't feel any love for me. This is honestly the most painful experience of my life. I feel like my life was a complete waste.
Prowl - Its easy to see them living this happy life together, but thats just not how these situations play out. Life gets in the way. Its easy to live in a fairy tale land of roses and cotton candy and such when you first meet someone. Add to that the fact he is some knight in shining armor coming to save her from this life that she cant wait to get rid of. But, eventually, that rush will fade and they will have to start living an actual life and likely there wont be anything left. So yeah, it really really [censored] for you right now. But theres no point in picturing her riding off into the sunset, because it just isnt going to end up that way.
As for your life, you have so much going for you. You have 6 people that look up to you and need you to be there for them. There is nothing that any other man will have over you in their lives unless you let him. But all of those kids NEED you to be the man and father they deserve. Think about if each of them have 2 kids. And each of them have two kids. Thats FORTY TWO people that will be in this world because of YOU. And it just goes on from there. So your life is not a waste.
You have FIVE sons. Show them how to be a man that you will be proud of some day. Show them what it means to fight for your marriage and fight for the girl you love. Show them how you dont just give up when times are tough.
You can do it Prowl. Pick your head up and keep going. You get to decide the legacy you live - not OM.
