Tad, I was also concerned to read your recent post. And agree with others that it may well be a good idea to talk to your doctor about your situation.

It's great that you are working and you have family. But you also have a desire to extend your life outside of work and are struggling to do it.

You said you are feeling like you have to do it, rather than you want to do it. I understand that, and I think many of us have cold feet about GAL we plan. For me, I often don't feel like going when the hour approaches. So, I make myself - and generally I enjoy it. If I don't enjoy it, I may give it another try or move on to something else.

Also, it sounds as though your S is feeling concerned too. Now, you may not become a local celebrity again, but for sure you can build your life up again into one that is fulfilling for you. It may take time, but with persistence you can do it.

But it does sound as though a little more support now might help taking those earlier steps easier...I would love to read about you managing to do some more GAL and feeling the benefits of it....

Take care, Toots x

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus