How much space do I give her

[Matt777]

I am currently working on myself and the 180, unfortunately things are happening slowly

This is a slow process. Change does not happen overnight. You can't just wake up and be a better man! Otherwise you'd have done it years ago. Think in months, not days.

I do fear that she will move on to om2 or never ended the first affair. since our situation was not good

You don't really have control over this. But how did you "close" the A? How did you heal together from it?

I just concerned eliminating all contact, will make me come across as cold...but then again she is not contacting me.....not sure what to do

Why would you come across as cold? Are you being cold? You aren't going to get her back sitting and waiting around for her. What's attractive about that? There is nothing you can SAY to get her back right now. You need to do it through your actions.