Rebuilding my castle...foundation is halfway...

[LoisB]

Lion,

Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate your thoughts and feedback.

I had a great day yesterday. D12 and I laughed in a way we haven't in a very long time.

Had my second meeting with the organizational coach. I now have a coach and therapist. Both are affordable and can travel with me wherever I go. If I need to take a break because of money, I can and I can restart... I found what I needed.

The coach is amazing. He broke down the areas where I need to focus into 5 categories. At first, the list was overwhelming-- long and incredibly discouraging. He was really encouraging, though that I didn't come any of these struggles in a vacuum.

I've learned so much about myself in the past few months. I think I've found the path to forgive myself for things I've hated about myself about since I was a child.

-I'm too introverted.
-I'm too weird.
-I'm terrible with money.
-I'm lazy, crazy, stupid.
-I'm weak.

B.S. ALLLL B.S.

If you learn how to do great things in a small place, you will be able to do great things in a great place. An acorn may look like a nut, but inside is everything necessary to become a great oak tree.

For anyone out there feeling like a misfit and tired of disappointment... For anyone who has a spouse reminding them of their defects and feeling the burden of past mistakes and struggles... get quiet. Listen to that voice deep within you pushing you on.

God will never leave you feeling discouraged or hating yourself. God "gets" whatever your particular crazy may be.

If you hear negative chatter in your head, that's not God. That good feeling you get, that peaceful feeling, that "AHA!" THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON! or THAT'S WHY I do THIS or I do THAT! That's God. Trust that feeling

Don't trust the negative. Listen to the positive. Listen to the calm.

Work on your level. Master that. Then, move up a level. That's my plan.