Heavy, I don't think she's being deliberately unkind. It isn't making sense. I really believe her head is so messed up right now that she's not thinking clearly.
About a month ago, while the boys were still living here, she came home (very late) one night, and manually bolted the front door before S20 got home from work. He had to ring the doorbell at nearly 1am in order for someone (me) to let him in. It was an innocent mistake... we don't have room for all the cars in our driveway, so he has to park elsewhere in the community, and she just didn't know he wasn't home.
But I sent her an email with housekeeping matters, among which was the request that she not bolt the door at night until she is sure that everyone is here. A few days later, she got home earlier and we were both doing things in the kitchen. At some point she bolted the door. I noticed and said, "Hey, I mentioned this the other day: PLEASE do not bolt the door till you know everyone is home... S20 is still at work." She said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." We both continue to putter around, she heads off to bed, and before I go to bed, I catch sight of the door - and she had bolted it AGAIN.
Now there would be no reason for her to be doing this... she's not spiteful, and why would she lock him out? She just really isn't thinking these days. As for the books, this is thoughtless for sure - but I don't think she's doing this sort of thing to hurt me. She's just completely self-absorbed.
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
